The
Fairer Sex
Emma
Frost #1
A
Tale of Two Emma’s, part one:
A
backstory we didn’t need
"Higher Learning, 1
of 6: Growing Pains”
Writer – Karl Bollers
Penciler -Randy Green
Inker – Rick Ketcham
Letterer – Cory Petit
Colorist – Pete Pantazis
Associate Editor – Mike
Raicht
Editor – Mike Marts
Editor-in-Chief – Joe
Quesada
August 2003
I
get that sex sells. I also get that out of all the books fumbling around in the
discount bin, I, a straight male, did pick up this book in particular. And
possibly did so based solely on two things: I know the character and that very
revealing, sexy Greg Horn cover image. And I’m betting it was more the
latter than the former.
I
can state that honestly because Emma Frost was by the late 1980’s as solid an
X-Man villain as you’d ever meet. We didn’t need a pointless and unconnected
backstory that told her origin any more than I need a third nipple. The
character appeared as foe back in issue 129 of Uncanny X-Men, tooled around as
both a straight up villain and as headmistress of the Hellions (a kind-of mean
version of Xavier’s New Mutants), and found redemption after the Phalanx
invasion gave her cause to become part leader of Xavier’s Generation X group.
But
this was the Joey Q era of Marvel, something I mark as the company’s slow side
into mediocre and bad decision-making in title choices and revisionist history.
So
Emma gets an origin story. The sad part is that this feels a bit like grafting
a rat to a pigeon: even when it works, you aren’t sure you want it to and the
end result is something that doesn’t look or feel natural. Setting Emma up as
the downtrodden underdog in a prep school full of stuck up snobbish girls who
harass and humiliate her at every turn is an ugly duckling story Emma doesn’t
need or deserve. Can’t she just be a straight-up biotch from day one? That’s kind of what
makes Emma fun. She’s an ice queen that you’re never quite sure if she has a
beating heart. Just when you think she’s a total wicked witch, she does
something nice and screws up that preconception…for a short while.
Certainly
that cover is a clever ruse designed to get red-blooded males to pick it up
without thumbing through it. Emma is in high school in this book and…well,
let’s dive in to take a look-see where we are at in this one.
We
begin with a full page establishing shot of Show Valley School for Girls, a
huge two story campus-type affair with those old-style windows that actually
open. As we pull in, the teacher is handing out report cards, telling each
student how good they’ve done as he calls the name and then hands out a card.
When we finally reach the window, the teacher hands a card to Emma Frost…
…and
then we pull into class to find…
…that
THIS is Emma Frost. Note the text confirms it to those of you still skeptical.
Not
what you expected? I know, right!
Emma
Frost has for years embodied the platinum-blonde, ice-cold yet fashion model
hot bitch (please excuse that term). She was cold to the core and part of that
was embodied in her look of conservative dress in public while underneath it
all was the seething dom goddess in white bustier, thigh-highs, and panties.
Her look was very much a part of her psychology, she wore an air of respectability
in public but her mutant persona came off as someone depraved, stuck-up and
power hungry.
And
that bleach-blonde hair sold it all.
Brunettes
are approachable, affable, and girl-next-door. Blondes, on the other hand, are
typically shown as either party-hardy bimbos or cold, calculating snobs. Yes, I
am stereotyping here, but part of this is the literary culture and social norms
we are brought up in. And the creators of Emma Frost played upon those stereotypes. “Blondes have more fun” is the age old myth, and brunettes
are typecast as being more down to Earth, more intelligent (even though an Ohio
study done in 2016 found the opposite in regards to IQ), and less likely to be
noticed. And while you can pick out a few blondes that don’t fit this mold,
they are more exceptions that prove the rule than establishing that the rule
doesn’t exist.
Being
blonde was part of Emma’s personality. It was part of who she is as a
character, embodying that she WASN’T the kind, sweet girl. The lighter locks demanded
notice, commanded attention. Emma’s hair color emphasized that she wasn’t
ordinary, that she was unique and unobtainable. It completed her frost queen
image.
So,
this hair color change is actually a big deal, character-wise. It points up
that Marvel is attempting to soften her image. In this school-age version, we
are going to see that the writers dumped everything we knew about Emma out the
window and started from scratch.
And
not that that’s a bad thing, necessarily. As tales go, this is a decent story.
However, it feels like it has ZERO to do with the Emma Frost seen in any of her
prior appearances and more to do with a teen romance movie the writer couldn’t
find a buyer for.
But
enough of all that…Emma is a hard-working, average intelligence student at an all
girl’s prep school…
…who,
unlike her stuck-up, popular-beyond-popular BLONDE classmate and nemesis Matilda, struggles
to make the A-B Honor Roll. Emma walks hunched over, friendless and beset upon
by Matilda …
…and
her clique of most likely to succeed peeps who mercilessly tear into the brunette,
mousy Emma for everything from her intelligence and rich parents…
…to
her underdeveloped physique and lack of sex appeal.
Uh…I
should stop the book right here and state that I don’t buy this for one damn
minute as being Emma Frost’s origin. It is TOO counter everything she has been
in various X-books up until now. Not that I think the story is bad, I just don’t
believe this is the same character (only younger) as the one on the cover. This is
a sympathy ploy. Anyone going all-in on this being the future White Queen of
the Hellfire Club I have a bridge I wanna sell ya.
And
bringing in the hunky, pedophile young teacher who will act as Emma’s protector
(and sicko love interest) doesn’t win the argument, either. Nor the “sudden
onset of mutant brain headaches.”
This
is simply a different character. And I go with the book along those lines.
I
go with it to the fabulous Frost estate, where servants attend to the Frost
family’s dinner needs, going so far as cutting the food for them. We meet Emma’s
crappy, overbearing, manipulative father, her stuck-up, uncaring mother, her
sassy, sexy fashion model sister, her punkish, gothy other sister and her vaguely
gay, good-guy older brother.
While
all this dysfunction is fun and all, can we get back to Emma for a moment? Emma
wants to go to the school dance (which happens in about 99% of these type
stories, I’m finding), but can’t without Daddy’s approval. Her Father, asshole
that he is, says she can’t because…
…her
grades haven’t improved enough. Which causes Emma to storm off, quickly
followed by big, gay brother Christian. We get a bit of snark from goth sis and
I find myself wishing the author didn’t have to shoehorn all this into an Emma
Frost backstory. Seems these characters would make interesting stories on their
own. In truth, I would much prefer to read that tale.
Why? Because
we have a neat little scene with her brother and instead of it going somewhere
interesting, we have to put in that Emma’s having headaches and fainting spells
and migraines and mutant, Mutant, MUTANT things going on. Boring. We know where
that tale goes.
It
goes to the fencing class next day where Emma is forced to spar against Matilda,
a duel that ends with a little bloodshed…
…
which is somehow Emma having A NOSEBLEED that has leaked onto the sword as it stabs her. No
really. That’s what it is. The school nurse has just the prescription for that,
though and before long, Emma is back in class…
…
where she can get hit on by hunky pervert teacher Ian Kendall, who shamelessly
stands too close to her. (thanks Police for that one). Stands too close and
makes certain that Emma will be at the dance by leading her into asking to
study him…A-hem!...for his help in studying for class with him.
And
like all those underdog movies with the cute girl who is actually smoking hot
but you aren’t supposed to notice because she wears her hair in a pony, has on
sweats and long-sleeve shirts, and always wears glasses, Emma shows up in a
dress looking amazing while turning every head on the page.
Emma
getting all this attention doesn’t sit to well with Matilda, who turns the
dance into a claws-out cat fight after ripping the dress off of Emma. Emma, in
turn, lays into Matilda with info she’s accidentally lifted from the girl’s
mind. Appears Matilda’s family is having a little money trouble. This escalates
matters quite a bit.
And
Emma is left the laughing stock by Matilda somehow…what happened to the hot
guy? Surely, he wouldn’t just abandon her like that, right? No? Well he did.
Not
to mention that the author of this tale has decided to just keep heaping this
on to the poor dear.
By
the time the pair reach the mansion, our over bearing Father has heard about
Emma’s night at the dance. He’s none to pleased about it either. And how he heard
breaks Emma’s heart…
So,
during the following day’s first tutoring lesion Emma spills the beans about
her abusive, control-freak father to sexy but too old for you Mr. Kendall.
Something
tells me that Mr. Kendall isn’t telling the whole truth here, but whatever.
This emotional outpouring brings our two wrong lovebirds together. They share a
fading sunbeam as Emma asks if she can get TOO FAMILIAR by using his first
name. It’s something that Matilda asked in the first part of the book and was
denied. The vibe of this is so creepy and improper that you want the book to stop
making this the central love interest, but no dice audience. You’re getting an
improper love story…
…which
becomes even more apparent when the next day Emma’s powers go wildly out of
control again, this time driving her to her knees with a bloody nose again.
And
we end with “Ian” holding a swooning Emma while screaming her name.
So,
I didn’t HATE this. There was enough going on to make me want more of the
story. That isn’t to say that I like to link it with my most favorite
underdressed X-Woman. It works as a solo story. It really shouldn’t be about Emma
Frost though. Marvel should have trusted this storyline as its own thing.
Instead
this feels crammed into a character’s history in a way that is neither helpful
in developing them in the present nor appropriate for how that character turns
out.
And
as long as I’m complaining, the teenage wank-tastic cover art is so misleading
given the story and art INSIDE the box, I have to take some points off there
for tackiness.
In
all, though, I read the first two issues and the story is decent. I’d buy more
to see where Higher Learning ends up going.
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