A
scattershot history of
Guardians of the Galaxy, Part 1
Guardians of the Galaxy #31
Guardians of the Galaxy, Part 1
Guardians of the Galaxy #31
It
feels like this series deserved to be "Annihilated"
"Prelude to a Kill"
Writer – Michael
Gallagher
Pencils – Kevin West
Inks – Steve Montano
Letters – Kenny Lopez
Colors – Evelyn Stein
Editor – Craig Anderson
Editor-in-Chief – Tom DeFalco
December 1993
They
came first in our timeline, yet second in their own.
First
appearance of these folks was January 1969 by writer Arnold Drake (of DC's Doom
Patrol fame) and artist Gene Colan. I was almost two years old.
The
Guardians of the Galaxy's original lineup looked nothing like what you will see
in theaters. They were:
Major Vance Astro (Major
Victory) – An
astronaut from the 20th century who spends a thousand years in experimental
suspended animation while his ship travels to Alpha Centauri. Perhaps the
result of the process used to freeze him, Vance developed psionic powers during
the trip.
Get
this: by the time he arrived at his destination, he found a thriving colony of
humans from Earth already there. Back on Earth, the ability to create ships
with faster than light drives occurred while Vance was slumbering, making his
entire voyage and the sacrifices he made for no real purpose. Talk about a
bummer!
Vance
formed the Guardians to free future Earth from the Badoon, who conquered it in
the early 31st Century. Vance is both the team leader and a huge
Captain America fan. Somehow he acquires Cap's shield in the future, which is
okay since Cap was dead at the time and really not using it much.
Yondu – a native of the Centauri IV planet
that ends up being Vance's destination, Yondu is the last survivor of his
species. A blue-skinned humanoid with a Mohawk like fin protruding from his
head, Yondu is a spiritual warrior who can control arrows via sound waves, most
commonly by whistling. HIM we've seen a version of in the GotG movie.
Charlie-27 – the last surviving
"Jovian" or genetically engineered human created to live in Jupiter's
crushing gravity. All other Jovians were killed in the Badoon's attack.
Charlie-27 looks a bit like a more human version of Ben Grimm's Thing and acted
both as ship's Captain and the group's "tank".
Martinex T'Naga – a crystalline humanoid from Pluto who
could emit heat and cold from his hands. He was also the last survivor of his
planet because all other Pluvians were killed by the Bado*…yah know? I'm
sensing a pattern here. Anyway, Martinex served as the ship's scientist and
technician.
The
Guardians in this incarnation struggled to hold on to a title. They didn't even
receive a shot at one until 1990, twenty-one years after they were created.
Even with the likes of Jim Valentino at the helm doing both words and pictures,
the title failed to attract legions of fans. A modest seller, it survived for
close to six years, the first three featuring Valentino and the bulk of the
ending two by the gents at work here: writer Michael Gallagher and artist Kevin
West.
I
find it difficult not fault someone for the failure of these characters. Mainly
because they were replaced by a team that contains a talking raccoon and a
"Space Ent" who only knows three words. And that team is WAY more
interesting than five (I'm counting Starhawk) characters who all have speaking parts. Maybe it was just
the 90's vibe or the fact that they were separated chronologically from the
ongoing Marvel continuity. I don't know.
I
met this version of the Guardians when they appeared in Thor and the Avengers'
saga of Michael Korvac. They seemed okay there, although they had interaction
with the active Avengers' roster which made things better. Here we have a small
bit of that too, but not really enough. This issue is near the start of Gallagher's
run. Juggling several plotlines, the book's timing appears off and like so many
90's titles, there is that vibe of style over substance at play.
Yondu
and Martinex aren't along for this issue, which means I don't know any of these
characters going in. No one. Not one familiar character.
Well,
okay. I know THAT character, but how was I to know they were doing a time
travel issue?
This
is where I'm going to step out of the story for a bit. The original Guardians
series biggest problem wasn't just the rotating roster. It tried to follow the
Avengers model of teammates joining up and then leaving suddenly. The revolving
door of membership meaning only Vance and Charlie-27 of the original quartet
are present for this issue and we have to figure out who Starhawk, Nikki and
Talon are. Starhawk and Nikki I know from my Korvak read through, but I have no clue
about the other one.
While
lineup changes are typically not a problem for team books, it might have been
one of the reasons for this version not becoming more popular. Most of their
add-ons couldn’t be featured in any other Marvel books due to the fact they existed
in the 30th century. This limited their exposure and subsequently
their popularity.
And
about that issue of these guys existing in the future: there are far too many
crossovers and time travel tales in the run. Marvel in the 70's and the 80's was
a hotbed of hero A muscling in on hero B's book. The Guardians didn't have an ongoing
of their own, but bounced from Marvel Super-Heroes, Marvel Two-in-One,
Defenders, Thor, and Avengers, just all over the place really. Most of these
adventures taking place in those book's current continuity. That meant time
travel. Lots of time travel. Every story was the Badoon doing something in the
past that needed undoing. It was excessive to the point of being silly.
What
Guardians settled for when they couldn't do time travel tales, were sprinkling
in characters from current Marvel continuity existing in the future. In the
handful of issues I have, we see Firelord, a Ghost Rider, Wonder Man, Dr. Strange
and Doctor Doom. If my cover search is correct, the series also pulled in the
corpse of Wolverine walking around like some type of admantium terminator.
What
I'm saying here is the guest starring syndrome that affected so many other
Marvel books was at work here, but it felt more forced than ever. A cosmic book
like this one set in the future tried to pull in sales from every conceivable
area to stay afloat, and some of those seem a bit contrived.
Anyway…Vance
is in the past, training with Captain America, his hero. In the future Vance is
the bearer of Cap's shield, an honor that the book took up its first six issues
for him to accomplish. Cap shows Vance a few tricks with the shield and then
they have an awkward moment when they both go to retrieve it at the same instant.
I
get a very "Lady and the Tramp" feel for this panel ordering. I
expect them to kiss or something.
Instead they are interrupted by Dr. Druid,
who had Vance leave his "future copy" of the Shield with him. Seems
he wants to talk with both star-spangled heroes.
Note:
is it odd that Vance wears the stars and stripes costume while flying around
the galaxy? I mean, is he still trying to represent "America" to all
of outer space? Just looks odd to me.
The
main contingent of the Guardians is still far in the future, hovering above the
Badoon homeworld in a stalemate of genocidal proportions.
Charlie-27
and his crew kick around the idea of how the Badoon could have figured out they
were there.
And
Starhawk isn't present because he is currently having a fight with his sister.
Which is a big deal because, well…Starhawk is special. Starhawk is actually a
guy by the name of Stakar, who is fated to reinhabit his infant self every time
he dies. This has led to Starhawk attempting to subtly alter the timeline with
each itineration of his life in order to change things. Thus sometimes things
don't work out the way Starhawk envisions them owing to his manipulations of
the current timestream he inhabits.
The
event that led to this "curse" was his attempt to resurrect an
ancient space "Hawk God" with his (unknown to him, adopted) sister,
Aleta. The attempt succeeds, however the deity gives them powers but only
allows one of them to exist in the real world at a time. The other is shunted
to an alternate "limbo" realm. Eventually the two find out they are
not related, have their timesharing existence nullified by the Hawk God, get
married and have kids – which turn into space vampires and then Starhawk is forced
to defend himself against which leads to their death…and, yah…they've got some
issues to work through.
Needless
to say, Starhawk won't be joining our trio for their big Badoon Day standoff.
I
won't comment on the convoluted mess above, much of it attributed to both
Valentino and Steve Gerber as writers, except to say…what is it about space Hawk-gods
and resurrected couples? Because that OTHER comic book company has one of those
pairs as well.
We
get two pages back on present-day Earth of a guy by the name of Redd being tortured
to give up the secret of some kind of broadcast called Realiteevee that a
villain named Retox wants back online. A secret that only Redd appears to
know. I don't know Redd. I don't know the woman Retox's head badguy Flashframe
brings out as an added incentive to get Redd to talk, Tarin, whom Redd professes to love. I don't know what Realiteevee is or how it works or why. What's worse is I don’t
care. Find me something I care about book. Quickly!
So
it does, or at least it tries to.
Back
to Cap and Vance, this time with Dr. Useless…er, ahem…Dr. Druid giving them
back their respective shields after placing an enchantment on them. Why you may
ask?
Oh,
the destruction of the Time/Space Continuum. Isn't that commonly referred to as
Space-Time Continuum? Just saying, I
think the Doc isn't as sure of what he is saying as everyone in the room
believes. What does his spell do, anyway?
I've
never found anything Druid did really useful. I mean he could have just said
for the two heroes not to use both shields or something. Hell, in the Korvak
Avengers, Vance wouldn't even SET FOOT on Earth for fear of jerking up his past
or bumping into his child-self. Now that he does come down, he forgets he is
using the same exact shield as Cap's? But whatever. The book needed a Cap
crossover and this is how we get one. Lame.
In
the bottom panel directly below this we find out it WAS Vance that warned the
Badoon because he couldn't bear to have his friends responsible for genocide.
Better they just get killed by hostile aliens you've been fighting against your
entire adult life, eh? This book has people doing things for some really
screwed up reasons.
Speaking
of those friends and the Badoon, the aliens open a channel of communication
again…right after firing a nuke near their position to get their attention.
Which, in story terms, could have caused the Guardians to fire their doomsday
option, killing every Badoon on the home world of Moord. It is a dumb story
device to make things seem more exciting. Which I'm not sure how that is
supposed to work since we don't see the missile being fired or the explosion,
just watch the characters talk about it happening. Dumb…
As
is this:
Which
could also result in both sides being destroyed and at least two races
completely wiped out. Why so much brinkmanship? I mean now is the time for cooler
heads to prevail. And finally they do, with Badoon offering this compromise…
The
Guardians suspect a trap, which it kinda is and kinda isn't…but even if they
lose, the Badoon aren't saying they will be killed. They are saying they lose
their ship and crew to them. Unless they are counting the Guardians as the
crew, not sure what this really sets them back.
However,
the Badoon offer up the location of their hatchery in exchange for an agreement
to the conquest. With the hatchery containing all the next generation of
developing Badoon. The Guardians are skeptical, so they probe the area.
The
flame-headed chick is Nikki. She and Charlie have a love affair at one point.
And then they don't. Because of things and stuff.
The
Badoon seem good to their word, leaving the team one task: deciding who should
be their champion. Meanwhile someone lurking in the shadows decides to not show
themselves because we need a mystery for next issue.
We
switch gears in a manner like stripping them, moving
to another part of the galaxy still in the 31st Century, to meet up
with this quartet of bad guys/gals.
Yup,
that's Doc Doom in the future. No clue how he survived for a thousand years,
but seems to me this gives him a big advantage over the Fantastic Four, since
they'd be dead for at least 900 years. Also he is forcing Shaddo, Batwing and
Rancor to do his evil bidding. They would do it anyway, because they are evil.
Something
about Rancor seems familiar. And I don't just mean the "90's jump out of
the comics panel with multiple speedlines" half-page, either. Let me look
her up…Oh my Gawd! Rancor is a distant relative of Wolverine. Look at her hair
and costume. I don't know whether to laugh or to cry. Wolverine with boobs. That.
Is. Just. Awful!
Dr.
Doom handles this busty female Logan-knock off with exactly the right amount of
respect, zapping her on her butt before force choking her air supply away. He
lets her live, which is to his benefit, but not to the audience's.
Evil
female Wolverine. Still speechless.
On
a more positive note, we get a decent scene of Cap and Major Victory jumping
across rooftops while Vance worries what he may have caused by opening a line
of communications to the Badoon to warn them, but instead just closing it
without saying anything. He's worried about his team but also about the
morality of what they were attempting, which would have spelled the end for the
Badoon forever. As always, Cap knows exactly what to say.
Sadly,
this doesn't make me want to read the book more. It makes me want to skip this
and go find a copy of Captain America's mag. None of these characters really
connect with me. And it appears we are going to be adding more current popular
characters to the mix to be sure we keep our audience size.
Meanwhile,
all three of the Guardians at risk think THEY are the obvious choice to fight
in the gladiatorial arena. Looks like Major Victory's leadership is sorely
needed with this bunch. Both Charlie-27 and Nikki start to tussle for the
chance to combat the evil lizard-people's strongest warrior.
So
we get some 90's hero-on-hero action that seems so stale these days.
Shouldn't
they be thinking about the damage they might do to their own ship? Not to
mention being on a deadline. Nikki's blasting does earn her the right to
compete. Well, her blasting and threatening the lives of her fellow teammate.
Yeah,
I can see why I didn't care much for the Guardians. They seem to have no team
spirit and lack a strong leader. In story terms, I'm not finding much to root
for here. And as evil as the Badoon are they at least seem to have one thing on
their side…
A
secret weapon that USUALLY only goes to someone worthy of the honor.
Yup,
that's the Captain Universe powers, which are powers that travel from person to
person, race to race, only appearing when fate has a hand in deciding the
outcome of something SUPER important. No clue how this trumped up contest
counts, but there it is. The Badoon are going to wipe the floor with Nikki.
Heck, with that they could wipe the floor with all the Guardians. The Cap
Universe powers are just that strong.
For
my first book-length read of a Guardians title, you can color me unimpressed.
It doesn't help that the team is scattered, that we have many unconnected
plotlines happening in the same book in different eras and that the gratuitous cameo
steals the issue instead of reinforcing its validity. Had the past issues been
this scattershot, I don't see how the title made to issue 30.
Being
this is only Gallagher's second issue, I should cut him some slack and the art
is very good in places. Next review of a GotG title, I'll show you how he
finally got most of his act together.
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