tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8052944325241602065.post2607947056263814374..comments2023-06-19T02:53:46.433-07:00Comments on The Crapbox of Son Of Cthulhu: Classics Illustrated: The Man in the Iron MaskSonOfCthulhuhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10360440962585168404noreply@blogger.comBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8052944325241602065.post-2476587186226317062021-05-03T18:14:23.222-07:002021-05-03T18:14:23.222-07:00Thoroughly enjoyed your commentary about Classics ...Thoroughly enjoyed your commentary about Classics Illustrated "The Man in the Iron Mask". I also have that issue, but the cover of mine is not as intact. So... I thought that this would be a tale of high adventure... surely the Musketeers rescue a poor sap who's locked in an iron mask, free him from the mask, groom him to replace the evil, evil King, and they succeed and all is well! Right...? Right? Errr.... no.<br /><br />It's not as if Classics Illustrated did a bad job with the adaptation... it's pretty accurate, but cuts off prematurely. The problem is in the *source material*, and sadly, it's all on Alexandre Dumas who wrote this mess. It's not entirely clear WHY the King needs replacing. Aramis has no internal monologue explaining his motivations, such as the King is bankrupting the nation, kidnapping beautiful women for his bedchamber, oppressing the peasants, making bad decisions about going to war, etc. Instead, Aramis wants a promotion... minister of France, and onwards to become the next Pope and replacing the King is his ticket. What a douchebag and power-hungry greedy ass! <br /><br />The whole release letter Seldon/Marchali switcherooo makes zero sense. Why bring out the Seldon letter, let the Baisemeaux read it, and THEN switch it for the Marchali letter, causing Baisemeaux to scratch his head? Why didn't Aramis just bring out the forged Marchali release letter to begin with? If you have a forgery, you DO NOT draw attention to it! <br /><br />Then, there's that secret bed that lowers from the bedroom to the cellars. Who built THAT? Why does that even exist? It's in Fouquet's house, so, is the implication that Fouquet had it built? For what? Sneaking mistresses in? Or kidnapping pretty damsels? Or did Aramis have that built in Fouquet's house without Fouquet's knowledge (???) for his "clever plan" (tm)?<br /><br />So, after Aramis' "clever plan" goes to hell in a handbasket, with Fouquet wanting NO PART it and then hurrying off to free the real King, Aramis didn't have a Plan B? No contingency in case something went wrong? Aramis is happy to abandon his puppet fake King with "tough shit, kiddo" and then goes hightailing off? So, in addition to being a douchebag and power hungry ass, he's also a coward.<br /><br />The "ending" of the Classics Illustrated story isn't the real ending... I guess they wanted to spare the children from reading further, and finding out that Aramis' plotting and meddling had caused Porthos' death, and the deaths of a bunch of innocent islanders. Athos and his bastard son, the actual Vicomte of Bragelonne were written out of this comics edition, also die. And D'Artangnan, still faithfully serving the real King (who becomes less of an asshole later) dies on the battlefield, opening a chest containg his promotion and Marshall's baton while cannons are going off all around. He should have ducked. <br /><br />Aramis is the last survivor of the Three Musketeers. Undeservedly. Did a major heel turn and his scheming directly caused the death of Porthos and made Philippe's life even shittier than it was. Earlier, at least Philippe could wash his hair and shave, and his cell in Bastille didn't look all that bad. He's gone from the frying pan into the fire, to spend his life locked in an iron mask. He was better off before Aramis got involved. Yeah... iron mask for life. because the King couldn't think of something else... put a scar on Phillipe's face, cut off an ear or something, anything to differentiate Philippe from himself. <br /><br />OMG this is awful... no wonder the movie adaptions play fast and loose with the source material.Ze Mastorhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02089642698758653642noreply@blogger.com